Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Hey, we have our own kingdom!

It just amazes me how you can start searching for Tom, end up on a gay twins blog and then eventually find The Gay and Lesbian Kingdom. The Internet is great, isn't it!

Official Links to The Gay & Lesbian Kingdom

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Is it really him in there?

I’m not really sure how to handle this so I am keeping as quiet as I can about the whole thing hoping it will somehow go away.

Last Friday Daryl picked up the Pug’s ashes from the vet. Yes, we have a little shrine in our living room with Pug’s ashes and pictures and other items from the dog. What am I going to do about this? To me it’s like we have a funeral home for an animal in our house. My philosophy is just plain simple. When something dies you bury it!

In the back of my mind I thought this was going to happen, but I was in big time denial. He is always bringing home something from a former resident of the nursing home that he works at “Martha made these coasters with her own two hands and her family wanted me to have them.”, so we end up with Martha’s coasters on the coffee table. We have all kinds of stuff like that lying around. Doesn’t anyone believe in leaving behind cash anymore?

Daryl has been pretty sensitive about the subject of his dog’s death and I don’t want to upset him. That leads me to another sensitive subject came up last night. Is it really Pug in the box? Charlene (Daryl’s daughter- in- law & power outage victim guest) had to open her big mouth and bring up something that I was trying to avoid. Apparently if you don’t request it, the remains of your animal and others are all cremated together. My friend Jeff had told me about this and I thought it best not to bring it up to Daryl. Jeff had been through dead dog crisis two years ago when his boyfriend Kerry’s dog (Chas is stored somewhere in a box in their basement.), passed away. I know that the discussion really bothered Daryl , but he is the queen of denial and he just shrugged it off and said " It's Pug and I don't want to talk about it anymore."

I have been thinking about an idea and I would like some feedback. I’m not a complete heartless bitch you know, I do understand that he really cared about the dog and needs some grieving time. I thought that after a while I would suggest that we buy some sort of headstone type rock thing with Pug’s name on it. Then instead of him sitting around the house collecting dust or eventually ending up in a closet, we could put him to rest in the back yard. The ashes are pretty well sealed, so I thought if we ever had to move and he wanted to take him along it would be a fairly simple process of digging him up. Is it a good plan? Should I just start facing the fact that I’m going to have dead dog ashes in my living room?

Sunday, February 25, 2007

It sucks to be us....

I don’t have much to write about this weekend except the weather. Iowa was hit by a major winter storm. We were not too concerned about the whole thing until the power went out last night around 6:30 pm. Our power came back on after midnight and so far everything is still a go. A friend of Daryl’s (Pat), is dropping off her dog for us to dog sit when she is at work because she is still out of power. The news is reporting that some people in the rural areas won’t regain electricity until the middle of next week. Sucks to be them!

Saturday afternoon I really didn't do much except watch TV and bake some cookies before we lost the power. I did watch An Inconvenient Truth again. The movie and the electricity being out got me thinking of how unprepared we are if there was a major disaster. We always have food around the house for a few days. We did have to hunt for candles and flashlights when we lost power. I’m not sure how we would have handled being with out heat for a few days. I guess we need to get some type of heater that doesn't need electricity for times like this. If global warming is going to lead to extremes in the climate, we might as well get prepared for times when the power is out. It’s just a good idea to have things on hand anyway. I’m not sure if it would make a difference as people now run to the stores and clear the shelves out if there is any sign of trouble. I guess its human nature to get use to things as they are and not expect things to change.

Today we went for a walk with Cinder and Pat’s dog Buster. The dogs seemed to enjoy it. With above freezing temperatures the snow was really melting, making it slushy walking. It was nice to get out of the house.

I hope everyone else enjoyed the weekend.
Post Note: 5:30 pm - 6 more guest arrive to stay with us tonight.
It looks like we are going to have more than Buster as a guest tonight. Daryl's friend Ryan, and Daryl's son's family will be joining us tonight. They all live in the town of Keystone which has been has been without power since yesterday morning. I guess they must not have had a generator for the water tower because the town has run out of water.

Friday, February 23, 2007

Ellen and Oprah

It was strange seeing Oprah on the Ellen show yesterday. For a minute when I first turned it on, I didn't know what show I was watching.
Ellen said that she was really excited about the prospects of a women or a black person becoming the US president.
That got me thinking. I feel that the perfect candidate would be Oprah. That is if she would fall in love and start dating Ellen. We would have the first black, woman, gay president! Who wouldn't be for that? Ellen would make a perfect first person too. Besides, don't you think they look cute together?

Thursday, February 22, 2007


This week has been one of those uneventful weeks that feels as if all I have accomplished is to go back and forth from home to work. I feel lazy, lazy, lazy. The truth is I AM LAZY and unmotivated outside of work. How am I going to get out of this slump? I have turned into a couch potato and that is completely the opposite of what I had in my plan for this year. I went back and copied my plan again so I can remind myself of what I am suppose to be doing this year. I have already lost two months of training and If I don't get motivated soon I will not be able to complete these goals. How does everyone else get motivated and stay on track?

My Goals:

Rejoin the gym - Rockwell Collins has a fitness center and it's very cheap for employees. I need to get my ass back there and start getting into shape. I am a very good biker. I love it, and have no problem training to ride. This year I want to start running. I will need the gym to start training to run long distances. It will just take me a couple of months to get back into shape, before can even think about running distances.

RAGBRAI - Last year I did it and loved most of it, meaning all but 2 days. Most people say it is a big party and they talk about that. I love the ride. There is nothing better than starting out in the mornings and riding. Iowa is really beautiful on a bike.

Freedom Festival Run - This will be my first race. I have given myself 1/2 a year to train so I should be able to do it. If not I'm a loser. Alliant Energy sponsors this 8k, 5k race. I plan to run the 5k.

Las Vegas Marathon - No, I am not that crazy to think I will be able to run a whole marathon! I should be able to 5k or who knows, maybe more. This race is in December of 2007 giving me plenty of time to train.

Mammogram testing booth

I received this email today and I thought I better pass on this important information. Ladies don't fall for this! It really isn't a mammogram testing booth. This reminds me of those holes in the dirty bookstores that I have heard about. :)

Tuesday, February 20, 2007


I was lucky. I can't imagine what my life would be like if I had to go to high school today. I was very insecure and a sensitive kid, so I know I wouldn't have been able to handle the type of harassment some of these openly gay students have to endure. I think I may have ended up being one of those statistics on teen suicide you see in the newspaper and magazines.

It's not like my high school didn't have its share of bullies. In fact, I remember one kid that had to endure a lot of pain because he couldn't pass as the rest of us did...or thought we did.

Ramsey Decker was the stereotypical nerd. He just didn't fit in. He wore dark thick glasses that had been taped in the middle after being broken. He didn’t wear the right clothes, say the right things and did everything in a "funny" sort of way. He was unique and in our small minds we thought that was abnormal.

People started calling him queer, faggot and what ever else they could think of. He was punched, pushed, kicked and spat at. I remember this happening to him day after day. This really saddens me when I think about it and the fact that I was one of those people that just stood around and did nothing but laugh. Fortunately for Ramsey he was brave enough one day to fight back. It wasn't a long battle, but it was enough to stop the bullies from continuing to physically assault him. We all know bullies always pick on people they think won't fight back.

After that Ramsey sort of embraced who he was. He still was teased of course, but he would counter act it with some self deprecating humor. He would openly talk about what guys he would like to go out with how and he couldn't wait to finish school so he could move to San Francisco and find himself a man.

I think Ramsey was the first openly gay person in our school. At the time I didn't even know what coming out meant and I certainly wouldn't have wanted to do that even if I had been sure of my feelings at the time. All we thought was that being gay was perverted and how we had to stay away from “those” people.

I'm not sure what became of Ramsey Decker. He graduated with my sister and I know that he has never responded to any request for information they sent out for their class reunions. My hope is that he did move to San Francisco and find a man. I would like to think that Ramsey not only found a man, but also found many friends and a place that he was safe to live and be himself.

The Cedar Rapids Gazette

• The proposed safe Schools’’ anti-bullying bill being considered by the Iowa Legislature would prohibit the harassment and bullying of students, based on their sexual orientation, gender identity, age, color, creed, national origin, race, religion, marital status, sex, physical attributes, physical or mental ability or disability, ancestry, political belief, socioeconomic or familial status.
• The proposed ‘‘Safe Schools’’ anti-bullying bill being considered by the Iowa Legislature would prohibit the harassment and bullying of students, based on their sexual orientation, gender identity, age, color, creed, national origin, race, religion, marital status, sex, physical attributes, physical or mental ability or disability, ancestry, political belief, socioeconomic or familial status.

'' Nobody would choose to be treated like I am. '' Robert Perrin-Hayes North Tama High School senior

Monday, February 19, 2007

"Chuck E. is a jerk!"

Rylee had her sixth birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese Sunday. The first twenty minutes I was wishing that they sold Xanax over the counter.

Daryl's grandchildren are for the most part very well behaved. They were all excited to see Chuck E. when he came out. I think the poor sap that had to put on the costume wasn't to enthused about it. Zachary said " Chuck E. is a jerk!", after he said hello to him and he didn't respond. Lacey gave him a couple of hugs. I tried to get a picture, but it came out looking as if Chuck E. is trying to do something perverted.

It was a long three hours, but I think Rylee and the other kids really enjoyed themselves.

Saturday, February 17, 2007


We lost one of our dogs yesterday. Pug passed away sometime while we were both at work. Daryl had pug for 15 going on 16 years. He really was Daryl's dog in every way, always waiting by the door for Daryl to return and would never be more than a few steps away from him when he was home. Even though his death was expected after this week of medical problems, Daryl is still taking his death pretty hard.

When I first met Daryl and his pets, Pug wasn't too excited to meet me. He actually sat next to my feet growling at me. Daryl said he new I was the one for him because Pug was really jealous of me and he had never reacted that way with anyone else.. It didn't take Pug long to warm up to me, he was really just a gentle dog who was the number one fan of his master Daryl. It feels really strange without him this morning. The little senior citizen will be missed.

Pug in the camper last year. He loved being outside and going camping.

Cinder and Pug last spring after we finished the patio.

Friday, February 16, 2007

-11° F this morning

The paper this morning said that the average temperature this month in Cedar Rapids was 4.5 °F. Suzie (Suzuki Grand Vitara) didn't want to start again this morning. The truck was working fine and I took Daryl to work this morning before I headed to work. I think Suzie is just tired of the cold. She started the last time after the temperature moved up a bit. When the temperatures get cold like this a person really needs a garage. We have one next to the house, but it's too small for the size of our vehicles. Being in an older neighborhood the garages were build when autos were the size of the Ford model T.

Check pool

I am in charge of the check pool at work this week. I forgot to tell you I won it last Friday. The winning number was "6" of course. I told you it was lucky for me! The new number I drew out for the next pool is 61.

The pool was two weeks with 13 people in it. So that is $26. Subtract my two dollars and it's $24. 2+4= 6 my lucky number.

What I'm listening to: I'm shuffling all the songs on my ipod today. It's kind of like listening to the radio with 457 songs to choose from.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Dead Truck

The truck died on us yesterday. Daryl thinks it is the alternator and it will cost $ 89 to fix. Today is his day off so he is working on it. It amazes me that a man that has a doll collection and crochets can also repair engines and hunt deer. He's a man with many talents!

What I'm Listening to: R.E.M.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Happy V.D.

We won't be doing anything for Valentines day this evening because Daryl is working a second shift tonight. He worked a double yesterday.

I had a nice card and some candy on the table this morning when I went downstairs. He will have to wait for his gift.( I am really bad at planning ahead and shopping, I usually wait until the last minute to do anything.) I plan on going tonight when I get off of work. I wasn't going out to the store last night because of all the snow. I got the truck stuck in the snow when I came home. The neighbor across the street helped me shovel out the driveway. After that I decide it would be best to keep off the roads. Please forgive me if you were one of the people at the intersection of 29th street and 1st Ave. yesterday morning, when I slid on through the red light. I hate driving in the snow!

After I get home from running around I will probably watch some TV and relax until bedtime. Not the most romantic Valentines Day, but I'm pretty content with it.

I hope everyone else enjoys the day.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Anna, John, Howard and I

I have to admit that I'm all caught up in this Anna Nicole Smith saga. I was switching channels last night making sure I didn't miss any of the juicy gossip as it unfolded. I think this is why I had this dream this morning. This is what I remember of it.

Anna Nicole Smith, Howard K. Stern and I are all on a yacht somewhere off the cost of Florida. I was playing the part of Anna Nicole's son at the age of around the age 13 or 14 . Hey, I know it sounds strange, but it's my dream and I can do whatever I want. It seems that I have developed some kind of medical emergency. I have this constant loud noise ringing in my ear. Anna, being the good mother that she is, solicits the help of John Ratzenberger. I'm not sure how he got on the yacht, but it seems he has a smaller boat that can get us to the mainland more quickly. I'm not sure why we just didn't take the yacht? John' s boat turns out to be a large air filled raft that is submerged in water. This isn't that big of concern for Anna and Howard and they jump right on board and have a seat, even though the water is at the level of their necks. I on the other hand am kind of leery about the whole thing. After a little persuading from John, I decide that I will go ahead and get on board with mommy and Howard. John gives me his folding chair and tells me I must hang on to it. ( I'm not even going to try to make sense out of that, so don't worry about it.) The next thing I remember is that we are on a school bus and I am lying on a seat in the fetal position in pain. Then Anna leans back over the seat in front of me to find out how I'm doing. I tell her that if this noise doesn't get any better I'm going to off myself right then as it is getting worse. The ringing is getting louder and louder!
Just then I wake up. My head is a few inches away from my alarm clock, it has been beeping for 20 minutes.

Friday, February 09, 2007


I intended to ride the bus home yesterday, but the weather seemed nice so I decided to walk home. I wasn't sure how long it would take me, so I followed close to the bus route as to be able to catch it if I needed to. It only took me around 40 minutes to get home. After I was home I checked the temperature and it was around 6° F. It's kind of strange when that feels like nice weather! I had a really nice walk home listening to music on my Ipod.

Dr. Jeff called me today and asked if I wanted to go to The Phantom Of The Opera this weekend in Des Moines if his husband isn't better. The flu has been going around this week. Jeff became sick the night everyone went to the Producers. He has had walking pneumonia this past week. Iowa is listed as widespread for the flu. This is the second time I have been exposed to this bug. I have my fingers crossed that I won't get it. Everyone says it's nasty little bugger.

I called Jeff's man his husband. I never really know how to refer to gay people's significant other, especially after they have been together a while. Boyfriend sound like they are just daiting and haven't been together very long and husband sounds like they are married even when then aren't. I refer to Daryl as my partner for lack of a better word. I guess I'm going to stick with using that until I find something different to use.

What I'm listening to: Pink

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Adapting to the cold weather.

The car wasn't working this morning. I think the cold temperatures have finally taken it's toll on it. I tried for a half hour to get it started, then the battery gave out.

Daryl had already left for work. He will work his first shift until 2:30 pm, take a hour break and head back to work a second shift. I ended up taking the bus. I haven't been on the city bus since maybe 1984. It really was pretty easy. I bus picked me up on the opposite side in front of my house and I ended up getting off a half of a block from work. I think the route home will be fairly the same. I may have to walk a couple of blocks. Now that I have tried riding, I may have to start doing it more often. It really is pretty convenient for me, as long as I'm heading straight for home after work.

What I'm listening to: The Black Eyed Peas

What we are reading in our bookclub:

Honeymoon With My Brother

My bookclub is tonight. I'm not sure I'm going to make it since the car is dead. I have already called two people for a ride and neither one of them are going tonight. It must not be my day for traveling.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Tuesday - It's COLD!

We have had a change in the weather this morning. It’s not only bitter cold, we are also getting snow on top of it! I hope it doesn't get to awful, as we are heading to Iowa City tonight to see The Producers at Hancher.

I have been feeling (mentally) a lot better the last few days. Of course it still hasn’t motivated me into any type of physical activity. I have lost a total of 5 pounds. I guess eating all those cookies didn’t help with the diet, but it did help me with my mood.

What I’m listening to: Nelly Furtado

I noticed that I have a large collection of what I call angry women CDs. I'm not sure what that says about my personality?

Sunday, February 04, 2007

I got an Ipod!!! (nano)

Daryl must have mental telepathy as he started looking and pricing for an ipod for me last weekend. He gave it to me on Friday after I came home from work. I knew there must have been a reason for him working all that overtime, because he really gets stressed out if he works too much.
I spent most of the weekend reading and adding songs to itunes , so I could put them on the nano. It was pretty time consuming. We did find out why the laptop keeps shutting off by itself. It was getting over heated. Now we have a couple of dirty movies (straight movies, icky...I was trying to sell them on eBay) stacked up under it. It keeps it from getting too hot.

What I'm listening to: Magnolia
I'm going to keep you informed to my listening habits. I really haven't purchased anything new for a while, except the soundtracks to the last musicals that I have been to. Everything I load on the nano is from my CD collection.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

cookie diet

I know I'm on a diet, but the grandchildren are coming over tonight and I thought I needed to bake some cookies. We will find out how well I'm doing when I weigh in on Monday, won't we?

Thursday, February 01, 2007

I need an iPod!!

I have been tuning out the news lately. Not completely, just enough to keep me happy. Sometimes I just need to take a break from the world and all its trouble. Global warming, President Bush and the war, it all gets a person down if you listen to the news. I know when I need to take a break from this. It’s when I really start to get pissed at everything. Then I say to myself, “Self, knock that sh*t off, you don’t need to be that angry all the time.” Well, I guess I think that way… I really don’t go around talking to myself all day like that; it would be kind of crazy if I did!

Anyway, I need to change the subject. My new subject is: I need, I want, I have to have an iPod! I can’t go on much longer at work without something to listen to! Because of all the frequency noise it’s hard to tune in a radio at work. Plus, if I had an ipod, I wouldn’t have sucked as bad as I did last night playing the game at the bar.

This leads me to last night and my music conundrum. After the beer tasting at Benz, I went to the Longbranch with my friend Dr. Jeff. They had $3.00 all you can eat taco bar and for the entertainment we played Name That Tune. I was having a lot of fun, but I a severely mentally challenged at the game. I was having a mental breakdown trying to remember songs from the past, most of them from the 70’s and 80’s. How lame is that? This is why I need, want and have to have an ipod. If I had one, I could once again start listening to music on a regular basis and be a better player of the game. Having it at work would make me a more productive employee too, as I would be much happier. I almost think that the company should supply them. Maybe I could slip that into my equipment budget? Fat chance I would get that by them!

I guess I’m going to have to break down and get one. I did ask for an ipod for Christmas. I got some cologne instead. I’m kind of thinking Daryl got me that gift because it would benefit him as well as me. An ipod would do him no good if I had it all the time. Valentines Day is coming; maybe I should start leaving hints? I need, want, have to have an ipod!!